Feeling stuck and in need of change?
Over the past few days, I’ve been revisiting an old book called “The Escape Manifesto | Quit Your Corporate Job | Do Something Different” written by the founders of ‘Escape The City’ In London, a global movement of over 300,000 people who believe in doing work that matters.
Many moons ago, I remember being sat at my desk as a Surveyor in London and I would frequently check their website to see what the latest job posts were, in what I considered then to be unimaginable careers in far flung places as well as right on my front door step, just down the road in London.
As a Surveyor, I often felt stuck and lifeless, yet this website connected me to a world of possibility that left me feeling inspired and hopeful.
There were some brave and courageous people saying ‘no’ to the corporate world and the conventional life, out there trying new things, attempting new feats, going off on adventures, learning new skills, creating new businesses, and making shit up. This excited me.
I think I may well have applied for one or two of the jobs being advertised on the escape website, but they were half arsed attempts at leaving my career, dipping barely a toe into other possibilities whilst keeping most of me well and truly glued to the world of doom and misery I’d created for myself pursuing a career path that simply wasn’t the right fit for me.
Luckily for me my corporate as well as surveying days are well and truly behind me, but I regularly work with clients who are stuck in that very same place I was all those years back dreaming of a different life but tormenting themselves with their limiting thoughts, fear and a lack of courage and imagination.
On the back cover of the book, it says in bold ‘LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO DO WORK THAT DOESN’T MATTER TO YOU’. I couldn’t agree more.
My partner, now well versed in the history of my many jobs, careers, travels, adventures, and homes lived in, once said to me, “you will get bored anywhere if you aren’t doing something that’s meaningful to you”.
I was honoured that she saw this in me and am even more grateful she is prepared to move around with me as I move around with my career path, following my curiosities, and exploring my purpose yet it was also concerning that this seemed so obvious to her and I, yet people still remain stuck in careers that are soul destroying, vacuous and are heading nowhere.
To be honest, I’m still amazed that people keep plugging away at jobs that bring them no sense of joy, meaning or purpose - to what end?
There’s never a perfect time to leave, you may never feel like you’re ready and you may never know enough!
So what? Who cares?
Are you going to let that stop you having a go at something new, being courageous and curious enough to want to find a new and different way of living and working that works for you, learning new things about yourself and other people and developing new skills? I hope not.
In Seth Godin’s 2007 book, ‘The Dip: A little book that teaches you when to quit (and when to stick)’ he refers to two places you may find yourself in at different points in your career, that once potentially started out as a fun, novel, new and a positive experience.
You might find yourself in a ‘Dip’ which is a temporary setback that will get better if you keep pushing through to the other side.
However, you may find yourself in a ‘Cul-de-Sac’ which is a total dead end leading nowhere.
In other words, when is it time to give up or grow?
When is it time to break away because you know it’s a dead end, you’re stagnating, not learning, growing or giving to the industry or the people within it or for whom it serves?
Or when is it time to push through because despite the current challenges and obstacles you’re facing, you genuinely consider the dip worthy of your time, energy, effort and talents.
After attempting and failing my APC (Assessment Of Professional Competence) to become a member of The Royal Institute Of Chartered Surveyor 3 times, I knew that no matter how much I tried, neither my head nor my heart were in it and it was time for me to pivot. It was a cul-de-sac and it was time to move on.
Sometimes I look back at my mixed career path and see there were times it was obvious for me to move on from certain things. I still often muse over some of the experiences I’ve had where I bailed when perhaps I should have pushed through and wonder where I could have been now if I’d have done so. This is the benefit of hindsight.
At the time, you have to make decisions based on where you’re at and what you think you can handle. You can’t force yourself to stay and you can’t force yourself to go. Sometimes you just know when it’s time to do either.
One thing I do know though is that often I struggled alone with some of these big decisions and had no strategy. I wish I could have had someone to help me brainstorm some of my thinking as the outcome to some of my problems may have been different.
I have no regrets. This has only left me feeling more resilient and rational, open and aware of the challenges that are worth pursuing and the challenging times that are worth me seeing through.
There is no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ in staying or going! We must remove all judgement from other sources as well as ourselves and we must tune into what is right for us at the time.
There is also no ‘right’ way of changing if you decide to do so! Sometimes it can be pretty, sometimes super ugly.
And unfortunately, there is no guidebook if you decide you do want to change.
There is however, a lot of information and advice out there from people who’ve done it, who’ve been brave enough to make the changes necessary to turn their situation around and start heading on a path that makes them happier, more fulfilled and gives them a greater sense of meaning, direction and purpose.
There are also helping practitioners out there prepared to help you and support you on your journey, help define and clarify your goals and aspirations, help hold you accountable to the changes you want to make and help celebrate your wins and victories as you go.
In this modern world, there really are no excuses for not pursuing a life that brings you joy and fulfilment.
If you’re considering making changes to your life and need support in doing so and someone in your corner as you navigate change, please don’t hesitate to get in touch.
Let’s have a conversation that may give you some insight and provide the shift you need to start steering your ship in a new and positive direction that excites and motivates you.
